Touro Brings Class-Action Against Diploma Mill Law School

The pot called the kettle black, but it was okay because the pot was more of a dark gray.  There's 50 shades, people, and law schools are quite familiar with all of them.

Yes, Touro College has brought a lawsuit against Novus University for turning out phony law degrees.  Yours truly has located a copy of the complaint on New York's online system.  Obviously, this school was really scamming people, as apposed to "scamming" people, like the law schools allegedly do.

Scambloggers, pay attention now.

Touro purportedly has standing to bring this because it's claiming it relied on false representations regarding accreditation made to third parties and as a result erroneously accepted cash cash cash, er, students, into its LLM program.  On behalf of the class (of all law schools similarly situated), Touro alleges that Novus claimed it was a legitimate foreign law school instead of an on-line school that didn't even have a faculty (the horror!!!).

The degrees, Touro says, are worthless.  Obviously!  This damages Touro, who only "admits students in accordance with its mission of educating future attorney [sic - is there one per class?] who will be qualified, competent, and ethical."  Novus, on the other hand, is a California corporation that allegedly set up in the Marshall Islands and represented itself as being international when it was not.  Both Texas and Oregon have deemed the degrees illegal/unauthorized, whereas Touro is legal in both.  Do you see the difference, scambloggers?!

Novus does not apprise the consumer of these facts, and in instead [sic], refers to its degress as "prestigious." [par. 60]
...
Novus's business model in [sic] predicated entirely upon falsehoods, misstatements, half-truths, and hyperbole.  [par. 64]

As opposed to mostly predicated on falsehoods, misstatements, half-truths, and hyperbole.

Touro claims that Novvus claims accreditation under Marshall Islands law when it states that it confers degrees on the "power of the Novus University of the Marshall Islands."  More representations that put Touro's panties in a bunch:

"Some of the best minds of our nation have law degress that did not require an LSAT, and you will rank among them with your own JD degree."  [par. 73(i).]
...
"[A]s the Internet becomes more and more prevalent in education the likelihood of expanding ABA approval to worthy online programs increases." [par. 73(iii).]
...
Novus communicates on its website that a Novus degree "qualifies you to be the authority on a number of different topics."

Obviously, these are statements of fact and not mere puffery or opinion.  Touro also takes issue issue with the conspicuousness of whatever disclaimers Novus actually made:

On the Novus website, in a section requiring multiple links to access, (hereinafter the "Buried Section"), Defendant makes mention of the ABA, the process to be licensed to practice law, and provides a lengthy "terms of service" provision.  (par. 80).

The so-called Buried Section also discloses that states generally require ABA accreditation and that the ABA does not approve online schools.

Touro wound up involved in "frivolous" litigation with people it had admitted into its prestigious LLM programs on the basis of having a Novus degree.  They use the word "hoodwinked"  (par. 129) and conclude that it is a "diploma mill" under federal law.  (par. 131).

My favorite line in the entire thing:

Any Juris Doctor degrees awarded by Novus are illusory and hollow.

...in light of the fact that Touro did not enroll in the program and the complaint does not make many affirmative allegations about the instruction itself.  I mean, I always thought learning the law gave you powerful versatility regardless of whether you were licensed in anything.

Touro's general counsel apparently did all this and signed it.  The law school that charges 22k for a semester is apparently representing itself pro se.  I suppose with such an obvious case, there's no need to hire outside counsel.

THE OBVIOUS TRUTH SECTION

1.  Touro obviously has standing to bring a declaratory judgment action against another for making representations addressed to a third party that the third party made subsequently to Touro.

2.  Touro obviously was duped by disclaimer information that's clearly available on the school's website and would, in the absence of such information, be common fucking sense.

3.  Touro obviously was duped by puffery regarding the abilities and prospects of graduates of this other school.

4.  Touro obviously did everything it could to ensure educational and institutional integrity in verifying the qualifications of all its applicants before placing them on the cash conveyor belt.

5.  Touro obviously has done nothing hypocritical at all.

When I speak to the Zen of scamming others, it's shit like this that has me bowing down and weeping while clutching my diploma.  People have alleged that Touro pumps out nearly-worthless degrees and was not conspicuous enough in telling graduates that they would most likely be unemployed and deeply in debt.  So what do you do?  Make some lemonade, motherfuckers.  Find a law school that's even worse as-in it basically takes students money conducts "classes" over email/phone (with no faculty, the horror!!!) and SUE SUE SUE.  

That's a real scam law school.

By comparison, Touro is obviously a prestigious, upstanding institution that would never, ever bilk its students in any way.