Sunday, December 29, 2013

North Carolina Law Schools Getting More Focused Applicants, Maintaining Course for Paradise Island

From somewhere in North Carolina that apparently hasn't bought into the whole "scam" thing:
Bill Hoye of the Duke University law school says his university is seeing students these days who are more “self-directed,” or “motivated.”
Yeah, you whenever-2013 graduates who were/are unemployed are totally non-self-directed and non-motivated.  You feckless, aimless idiots just came to law school without the necessary attitude.  Now, law students are motivated.

The science of law school scheming has made great strides in the last five years.  Whereas law deans used to employ statistical manipulation and the vulgar science of mathematics to demonstrate that students would find success post-graduation, they've now moved to higher orders of thought, a peculiarly baffling alchemy where finding the most self-directed students will suddenly create broader job opportunities in legal employment.

They've moved from the turf of the rationalists to the turf of Zig Ziglar and Rhonda Byrne.

Attitude is everything.  Sha-to-the-zam.

And yes, self-directed people still need three years of legal education to direct them in the right path.  Sometimes, of course, that versatile moneypath leads to artistry:
This is not to say a law degree can’t be valuable to students who decide on business careers or even choose to become writers or artists. Law school teaches people to think analytically, to learn to advocate for their position and to organize themselves in every endeavor. 
The establishment of new law schools in North Carolina over the past years (at Elon University and at The Charlotte School of Law) was questioned by some lawyers in terms of the demand for such schools. But the demand clearly is there, and the high quality of student has been maintained.
Poll time!

Which is the best-chosen word/phrase in this excerpt?

A.  Decide
B.  Choose
C.  "Organize themselves"
D.  Clearly
E.  High
F.  Maintained

Well, I wish you all a happy new year.  I'm off to self-organize, as I learned during my law school days.  I think heart tissue goes above liver tissue, and that pants are best put on one leg at a time.


  1. Advocate!

    In law school I learned to advocate for my position. Before going to law school I was always assailing my position. But three years of inspired legal instruction taught me that that was NOT the right thing way to present an argument.

    1. Hey, I didn't even HAVE a position to assail or advocate for before going to law school. Thanks to law school, I now have a position. Assistant Manager at the Cracker Barrel in Paducah, Kentucky.

    2. At least you got to deal with 1st Amendment issues due to the whole "Duck Dynasty" controversy, amirite? Talk about "JD-Advantage!" You should send that in to the dean of your law school and maybe get your own page in the next glossy brochure! ;)

  2. I'd say that "decide" is the trickiest word in that piece of propaganda quoted above. After all, you have to decide for yourself which poorly-paying non-legal job you prefer to starvation and homelessness...after borrowing $200,000 for law school.

    On the other hand, the word "high," as in "high quality of student," isn't just a tricky usage, but an outright lie. Those greedy, shameless bastards. Isn't there anything they won't do or say to keep the raises coming?

  3. Let's continue to barbecue the lying bastard law school pigs in the new year! Thanks for your hilarious and insightful contributions, LSTC.

  4. I would say nothing chills thought and entrepreneurship more than a high debt load and an ethics committee staring over your shoulder. Even Ben of Ben&Jerry's said if he had student loan debt he likely would not have started his company.

    Life is hard enough to begin with, nobody needs a massive handicap on top of the rigging you get from not being part of the elite classes to start with. Whoever thought of student loans should probably be shot and tortured.