But the good folks at College Magazine* have come with a whopping TWENTY TWO! That's the type of creativity America's business leaders are looking for!
Just look at the lead-in:
Suits and Legally Blonde convinced you that you want to be a lawyer. Will you get to argue a high profile case during your three years? Probably not. But law school offers rewarding experiences you won’t find anywhere else.
"Probably" not. There's still a chance, SuperLemming!
I don't want to spoil all the reasons for you. But some of my favorites include:
2. Contest a Ticket Like a Boss ("You’ll no longer have to groan when you see that white slip neatly tucked under your windshield wiper or panic when you see flashing lights in your rearview mirror."This is all topped with a list of upcoming LSAC forums at the bottom. Of course, the list omits the best reason to get a law degree, but I guess 22/23 ain't bad.
10. Know How to Act When Disaster Strikes ("Being a law student prepares you to plant both feet firmly on the ground while the walls are caving in around you....Keep calm and get a law degree.")
16. Get a Leg Up in the Job Market ("Law school provides the confidence and credentials for any job, even if a law degree isn’t required.")
22. Ease into the Real World ("Law school provides a transition from the wild world of college to the wild world of life.")
*Is College Magazine like Seventeen where it's actually read by a half-generation lower than the target audience?
Satire can't compete. It can't even come close.
ReplyDelete"20. Make a Difference: Provide legal aid to those who really need it. Whether you need to help out your friend caught in an unjust situation or defend someone who has wrongly been convicted, a legal background can really help save someone’s life. You’re like Superman in a suit and tie. Even though you can’t leap tall buildings in a single bound, you are a symbol of hope for the masses that has the power to right the wrongs of the world."
Well, you know something is ironclad truth when it and the satire are functionally identical.
DeleteShockingly irresponsible.
ReplyDeleteI agree; satire can't compete, and it can't even come close.
ReplyDeleteSatire can be prophetic; here's Wiki:
Satirical prophecy[edit]
Satire is occasionally prophetic: the jokes precede actual events.[111][112] Among the eminent examples are:
The 1784 presaging of modern daylight saving time, later actually proposed in 1907. While an American envoy to France, Benjamin Franklin anonymously published a letter in 1784 suggesting that Parisians economise on candles by arising earlier to use morning sunlight.[113]
In the 1920s an English cartoonist imagined a very laughable thing for that time: a hotel for cars. He drew a multi-story car park.[112]
The second episode of Monty Python's Flying Circus, which debuted in 1969, featured a skit entitled "The Mouse Problem" (meant to satirize contemporary media exposés on homosexuality), which depicted a cultural phenomenon eerily similar to modern furry fandom (which did not become widespread until the 1980s, over a decade after the skit was first aired)
The comedy film "Americathon", released in 1979 and set in the United States of 1998, predicted a number of trends and events that would eventually unfold in the near future, including an American debt crisis, Chinese capitalism, the fall of the Soviet Union, terrorism aimed at the civilian population, a presidential sex scandal, and the popularity of reality shows.
In January 2001, a satirical news article in The Onion, entitled "Our Long National Nightmare of Peace and Prosperity Is Finally Over"[114] had newly elected President George Bush vowing to "develop new and expensive weapons technologies" and to "engage in at least one Gulf War-level armed conflict in the next four years." Furthermore he would "bring back economic stagnation by implementing substantial tax cuts, which would lead to a recession." This prophesies the Iraq War and to the Bush tax cuts.
In 1975, the first episode of Saturday Night Live included an ad for a triple blade razor called the Triple-Trac; in 2001, Gillette introduced the Mach3. In 2004, The Onion satirized Schick and Gillette's marketing of ever-increasingly multi-blade razors with a mock article proclaiming Gillette will now introduce a five-blade razor.[115] In 2006, Gillette released the Gillette Fusion, a five-blade razor.
Please use satire to guess the future of these grads!
The best reason to get a law degree is presTTTige!
ReplyDeleteAlso, are these jerks familiar with the maxim that a lawyer who represents himself has a fool for a client?
they should just repackage this listicle and post it on BuzzFeed, Gawker, EliteDaily, and all those idiotic web sites. let it go viral on twitter and let these lemmings destroy their futures.
ReplyDelete