The Law School Way: Your Ticket to a Meaningful Existence

All too often, we see muckrucking bloggers ignore what I call The Law School Way, those life-affirming, intellectually enriching qualities of legal education and practice that transcend easy obective dismissal and sound like ooey-gooey mushy goodness.  Instead, the simpletons choose to be narrow-minded number zealots who focus on things like being employed and repaying loans, which are not as high up on the pyramid of needs as having a meaning and purpose in life, so they are not as essential.

They simply don't get the unbridled mirth of The Way.

The Wall Street Journal calls this basic approach "provocative" in its discussion of Sherman Clark's latest epistle.  Ah, yes, the Wall Street Journal would think the pursuit of meaningful truth is a provocative proposition.

Anyway, here's Clark, sort of:

“[I]f we are to be thoughtful about the impact of law school on the quality of lives, we must be willing to think at least tentatively about what makes for quality in life,” writes Mr. Clark. “Law school must teach law and lawyering and nothing I say here is meant to deny that law schools above all must provide professional training. Indeed, my claim is that it is the very study of law and lawyering that can develop the capacities and habits of mind that, in turn, can help one wrestle with deeper issues.”

How very Socratic, which is fitting, as legal education is, in many ways, is preparation for dying, if not a direct injection of pure hemlock.

You see, people who don't live The Law School Way have no way of employing critical analysis to the world around them on deep issues of social justice and ethics and the delicate balance between liberty and authority, not to mention the body as a dignified last stop against the abuses of central power and the contours of the intersections of race and gender in post-integration municipal elections.  People who live outside of The Law School Way never find meaning in their lives, for they lack the tools to even comprehend the immense meaning of the things they would do, if only they had a legal education.

This is, of course, why attorneys have incredibly high qualities of life and remarkably low suicide, depression, and substance abuse rates.

Because The Law School Way is a mode of thinking you can only (or primarily) find in America's ABA-accredited hallowed halls, where the mind becomes able to grasp at those deeper issues.  Indeed, Clark himself is so in tuned with greater humanity that he anticipated skepticism towards his self-evident truth/belief that law school is a special and unique provider of the essential tools for finding value in continued life:

“I recognize that framing the question in this way may create some skepticism.”
...
“But wherever lies a rich and meaningful way of living, and whether it be manifold or one,” Mr. Clark concludes, “we all should agree that it is worth seeking. And we should all agree that what increases our ability and willingness to look for it is of great value indeed.”

Can we not at least agree to this fundamental premise of The Law School Way?  Surely, the debt slaves would be fools to claim they didn't want a meaningful life.  Theirs, of course, involves little more than a callous mountain of cash, but that's still meaning.

And is it not obvious that law school increases one's ability and willingness to seek a meaningful life?  Learning about the precise bounds of personal jurisdiction under federal law is a key slice of pavement on the road towards enlightenment.  Who cares if the rent is late again?  Law school will teach you about the statute of frauds and the commerce clause, which will help the true believer think deeply about events both far and near, from solving the eternal problems in the middle east to figuring out the perfect way to ask whether she's on the pill or not.

You cannot do these things without going to law school.  Take my word for it.  I went, and now I'm a super-brain who lives on an ethereal cloud of hovering silk-covered textbooks where it never rains and everyone appreciates the utter baloney that comes out of my mouth and impeccable grasp of citizenship and ethics.

If you, too, want to live a meaningful life and gain that peace that passes understanding, I encourage you to join our faith in The Law School Way.  We have over 200 locations nationwide, and unlike other churches that constantly pass the plate around, we only ask for a modest tuition fee in exchange for life-altering grace and wisdom.