Viginia Media is Awesome

From NBC's Charlotteville affiliate:

[T]he University of Virginia School of Law is being recognized for its job placement success: 99 percent of the graduates find meaningful work.

Emphasis added to showcase the fine - and awesomely inexplicable - adjective placement. (The video piece: "not just work, but meaningful work.").

For a short article/piece, UVA Assistant Dean (Career Services) Kevin Donovan went balls-out:

"If you are coming from a school like UVA you shouldn't just be focused on getting a job, you should be focused on trying to get a job where you are going to be able to make an impact on your world and to really feel like you've accomplished something you are happy about[.]"

UVA law's job placement beat out all of the other top law schools in the country - Harvard, Yale, Stanford, Columbia. 

Donovan says UVA law doesn't focus on rankings - even the good ones.

An existential crisis or sorts: which do I laugh at first?

For reference (all numbers from LST):

FULL-TIME, LONG-TERM LEGAL JOBS MINUS SCHOOL FUNDED
Stanford 89.0%
Columbia 85.3%
Harvard 84.6%
Virginia 79.7%
Yale 77.0%

FT-LT FIRMS 2-10
Virginia 3%
Harvard 1%
Yale 0.9%
Stanford 0.0%
Columbia 0.0%

FEDERAL CLERKSHIPS
Yale 34.7%
Stanford 28.2%
Harvard 17.8%
Virginia 14.3%
Columbia 7.9%

You idiots expecting media to help force change are barking up the wrong tree. You think these people want to look at HOW exactly UVA tried to claim superior job placement to the heaviest hitters? Heck no - they're just going to include UVA with Yale and Harvard and call it an afternoon. Local media has much more of an interest in blowing smoke up people's butts and advertising about lollipops falling from the sky.

You think the local NBC affiliate is going to question a dean who suggests law grads have the luxury of doing something that makes them happy? Do you think they called any of the 1/3 of the class working at firms of 500+ attorneys to ask them about their 80 hour work weeks spent saving America's wealthiest entities money?

Do you think they're going to laugh uproariously when UVA says it "doesn't focus on the rankings?" NOPE! They'd much rather report on a rabbit who turds out Barrack Obama portraits.

Fourth estate, bitches. These people eat out of our hands. They buy the statistics even after the courts say that they're so absurd they can't be relied upon. Virginia has their affiliate grouping them with the creme de la creme even though almost no one thinks of UVA with Harvard, Yale, and Stanford anymore.

I'm hitting the bar. God willing, I run into a coed who loves animals. I can tell her all about litigating for whales' rights in Alaska. Lying to get a woman into bed might be unethical. Lying to get her into law school? Well, that's just business.